This question ranks pretty high on my List Of Stupid Questions I Don’t Wish To Be Asked. It’s right up there with “Well, aren’t you afraid he’ll never sleep in his own bed?” and “But if he doesn’t go to school, how will he get socialised?”.
By asking if a baby is ‘good’, you are insinuating that a baby can be inherently ‘bad’, also.
When people talk about babies, the word ‘good’ usually means that they are quiet, happy, and sleep for many hours at night. Does this mean that my baby is a bad person if he is unhappy, or if he wakes his sleeping mother because he needs to feed, or be otherwise comforted? Not likely.
When did we start expecting children to behave like little adults? When did we start thinking that they have the same level of control over their impulses as a grown-up does? The whole attitude that western society has towards children is perfectly summed up in this ridiculous question – children should be seen and not heard. Babies should be dressed nicely, sat in their playpens smiling away, and woe betide them if they should cry, or shout, or stamp their feet, make a mess of their clothes or demand our attention at night. God forbid that they are needy, passionate little creatures that need to be mothered according to those needs.
Well, if a quiet, compliant drone is the definition of a ‘good baby’, I’d rather not have one, thank you very much. I’d rather stick with my loud, emotional, vivacious ‘bad’ children who get messy, have tantrums and need to be parented during the night as well as in the day. Believe it or not, my role as their mother doesn’t stop when the sun goes down.